Saturday, August 28, 2010

on birthin' babies, part one

as i write this, it's 2am, and i am nursing my new boy. finn william coposky was born at 10:27am on monday, july 12th. he weighed 7lb. 13 oz. and was 20 inches long. he's the sweetest thing ever, and so far, everyrhing about him has been criminally easy. i can't even begin to tell you how lucky i feel to have two super-healthy babies at my "advanced maternal age" or really, at any age. given all that can go wrong in the development and birth of a baby, i know full well what a miracle i have on my hands. and dear lord, i am thankful!

let's talk a minute about birth, which has become such an industry in the US. y'all know me well enough by now to get that, given the choice, i'd rather have had my boys naturally than any other way, and that it hasn't been an optuin for me. when kieran was born, by blood pressure was slowly creeping up at the end, which means that my doctora were pressuring me to induce. i still, and will always, wish i could go back in time and fight for more time. actually, i'd love to go back and get a midwife, but this is because i didn't know then what i know now. but i digress... anyway. with the critter, i was induced 4 days after my due date and ended up having a c-section after full labor and 3.5 hours of nonstop pushing. not the best experience.

things were pretty different this time around.

this time, i never developed the gestational hypertension we were all waiting for. they monitored the crap out of me, but there was nevernany sugn of any problem whatsoever. however, given the facts of the first birth, my odds of a successful vaginal birth this tume were on the order of 25%. couple that with the fact that the doctors really didn't want me to go past my due date given my age, the size of the baby, my blood pressure issues, and my personal risk of developing pre-eclampsia, and with the hippie's desire to never watch me go through that whole meaa again, and i decided not to buck the system. i had a scheduled c-section 3 days before my due date.

now, let me make two points:

1) all of my doctors recommended that i schedule the surgery on my actual due date to give my body as much time as possible to go into labor on its own. however, the hospital schedule was full, so it wasn't an option. neither was the day after. then it was the weekend, and they don't schedule them on the weekend. they didn't wabt me to wait as long as the following monday, so... you start looking the other direction. the due date was a thursday. the doctor on call on wednesday is the dude who atripped my membranes last tine without talking to me about it. tuesday was doctor death--no thanks--i'd rather have my mother do the surgery. monday waa the doctor i trust the most, with whom the hippie was most comfortable, and who delivered the critter. dora that seem like a no-brainer to anyone else?

2) all of this said, if you are pregnant, i would encourage you to try a natural birth, with a midwife if possible. and if it's not possible, then choose your practice carefully. and do not be afraid to trust your instincts and stand up for what you want. listen to the doctors, but make your own decisions, and don't let them bully you. they will. keep in mind that your doctor, no matter his opinion of himself, is just a person and not the boss of you. you are an intelligent, grown woman. read. learn the facts. ask queations. be a pain in the ass. and if, after all that, you need medical help, take it! and if you end up with a medicalized birth, try not to feel like you have failed. harder than it sounds, but important.

ok the kid has finished eating, and i am about to pass out, so i am going to finish this tomorrow with a discussion of what all was different about this c-section and the previous one. so many things made this such a different experience!

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