open house at the celebrity dairy

a couple of weeks ago, we went with friends to the bi-annual open house at the celebrity dairy, which is a working goat farm and B&B in siler city, nc. they sell cheese and eggs, and many of our local shops and restaurants feature their products. it was one of those absolutely gorgeous warm sunny days we sometimes get in the late winter here in north carolina--one of the many reasons i love living here. i've made a pact with myself to start searching out and taking advantage of some of the many free, cool, and interesting things my area has to offer, and to get kieran outside to see his world as much as possible this year. (thanks to betsy for letting us know about thisone!)

we met up for brunch, then headed to the dairy with jenn and harry and betsy and all the girls. there, we hooked up with amy and kelly and baby sage. we spent the afternoon tromping around the farm (in the mud!), checking out baby goats, pigs, one bright blue peacock, and about 700 chickens. gabriella chased chickens for two solid hours and then cried when we left because she couldn't bring one home with her--she is a born farm girl. even kieran got to get his little paws on one of them, which utterly delighted him, of couse. afterwards, kelly and amy spontaneously came back to our house to grill out and eat goat cheese (not me--because ew--but everyone else did), and we threw the boys into the tub so that the babies would have that clean baby smell and be a little less farm-ish. all in all, a fabulous, wonderful day.

the complete set of pictures is here.

fitness snippet

by some bizarre quirk of my body being weird, i weigh less now than i have in like 10 years. this is not normal for a person who has had a baby in the past year, but i am not knocking it. ( i do kind of feel like i have somehow cheated and am having some emotional issues accepting it as reality, but that's a topic for a longer, more self-involved post than this one, which i have about 2 minutes to write.) and being so oddly close to my goal weight, i figure i should maybe make an actual effort to get there. here's my thought of the day on that topic:

some days my thoughts go like this:
less simple carbs--more fruit--take the stairs--take a walk at lunch--yoga?--eat more veggies and less meat--how lean is this protein?--STEP AWAY FROM THE CHOCOLATE--can i run up these stairs?

other days, it's more like:
fuckit--fuckit--cookies--fuckit--fuckit--cupcakes--mmm...fries...--fuckit

what gives, self?

critter update

maybe fridays are the right time to check in on the critter, or at least post some pictures of him. kieran is two weeks from his 9-month doctor's appointment. he is growing by leaps and bounds and will soon be completely out of his 6-12 month PJs. time to go shopping again! he's a blast lately, although i could do without the sleepless nights that come along with this whole teething thing. the bottom front two teeth came in pretty easily, but man--the top two are a BITCH! you can see them through his swollen and tender gums, and he's clearly not enjoying the process. i wish they would just hurry up.

other than the teeth, though--we are having a great time with him, as is jennifer (our friend and nanny) and her whole family. he's become one of the pack at her house, which is perfect. he loves them as much as he loves us, and while this is sometimes hard sometimes emotionally for me, i think it's definitely the best thing for him. he's happy to go in the morning, and happy to come home in the evening, too. gabriella loves him and reads to him and makes up games for them to play. and he immitates her and wants to get into everything she's doing. she is why he can climb stairs like a champ at 8 months old. she's why he loves throwing himself down on the bed and laughing over and over. she's a big part of why he loves his books so much. we are lucky and grateful.

he continues to astound us with his mobility and crazy development. he can draw lines on paper, keep rhythm with his maracca (favorite toy in the world!), and LOVES LOVES LOVES music. he is superfast at crawling, pulls up and climbs on everything, and is a huge fan of the stairs. it's all awesome and scary as hell at the same time. mostly, we let him explore and spot him. he laughs at everything new, claps his hands^* with excitement over things he loves, and is definitely developing some rather strong opinions about things. he is starting to initiate games with us, which is great fun, and oh, so cute! he's showing signs of becoming more and more independent, too--preferring to feed himself rather than have us feed him and to get his own toys off the shelves and out of the baskets instead of us giving him things to play with. all normal and good. again with the lucky and grateful.

it also continues to scare the crap out of me on a daily basis--this whole parenting thing. i pray more. i hope more. i fear more. i just want him to be happy and healthy, and i hate that i can't just guarantee that for him myself. i am sure every new mother goes through this. it's so weird--it's not that i want to protect him so much as i want to somehow ensure that he doesn't get more than he can handle, if that makes sense. or more than WE can handle. mostly i just try to backburner these thoughts, since they are all related to things over which i have zero control. in spite of that fear, he is just a wonder and a delight, and i am so happy to have him in our lives! it's really truly unbelievable.

this series of pictures is from hanging out at home last weekend. kieran was "helping" his daddy put some chairs together. he "helps" a lot these days--must be in the thick of things at all times. wonder where he gets that?

* a note on the clapping thing: we've been playing clapping games with him forever, but something clicked in his head on christmas day when my 6'3", 280 pound, barrel-chested tree of a brother was playing pat-a-cake with him. this was one of the funniest things i have ever seen--doug was hamming it up insanely, and the critter was totally enthralled. 5 minutes later, he was clapping himself--it was such a sweet moment. it NEARLY made up for the horrific stomach virus doug gave me that day. nearly...

crockpotting

for christmas, my friend jenn gave me a crock pot--something i have wanted for literally years and have just never gotten around to buying for myself. this weekend was my first foray into the world of the slow cooker, and it was AWESOME. we made a BJ's run on saturday and came home with a lot of meat--a perfect time to bring out the crock pot, right? having no idea what to do, i googled, read a bunch of recipes, and then just made some shit up. here's what i did.

INGREDIENTS
1 4-pound pork loin roast
8-10 shallots
1 cup chicken broth
5 cloves garlic
4 large, lush rosemary sprigs
~1 pound green beans
salt and pepper to taste
olive oil

DIRECTIONS
peel shallots and cut each in half. place cut side down in bottom of crock pot until the bottom is covered in shallots. salt and pepper the roast all over and rub in. this would be an excellent time to apply any spice rubs you find intriguing, but i didn't this time. heat some olive oil (maybe 2-3 tablespoons?) in a heavy skillet and brown roast on all sides. (this step also known as--make a big spatter-y mess out of your stove, but whatever.) place roast on top of shallots. pour cup of broth over roast. cut garlic cloves in half and place in a line longways down on top of the roast. lay rosemary sprigs on top. place the lid on the crokpot and cook on low for 8 hours. when there's about 45 minutes to go, add the green beans.

when everything was done, i picked out and discarded the rosemary sticks, put the green beans in their own dish, and pulled out the roast to slice it--little did i know that it was going to fall completely apart. this was ok with me--i am open minded. i used an immersion blender to puree the shallots and garlic with the broth and pan juices to make a gravy, and then added the pork back to the pot. i served this over rice noodles with the green beans on top, but in retrospect, i think it would be better with some wild rice or something with a little more body than the egg noodles. in any event, it was YUMMY! i would definitely make it again.

a note on the immersion blender. i borrowed one from my friend jenn to try it out, and now i need one. it was AWESOME--so fast and not too messy. i am currently lusting after this one. you need one, too.

i have been asking around for crock pot recipe recommendations from people who know from food, and here are my three faves so far, in order of how strongly they were recommended:

fresh from the vegetarian slow cooker (book)
a year of crockpotting (blog)
not your mother's slow cooker cookbook (book)

if y'all have favorite recipes, i'd love to hear them. i am all about trying stuff in this thing now!

monday knitting update: the amanda hat

mondays are for knitting updates. i guess--why not? i made a hat. hats are about all i can swing lately, but that's ok, as i have not yet gone through a round of hat gifting. there's a group of people on ravelry knitting 3 hats for january, and i thought about joining it. but man, i don't need the pressure. i am just knitting hats when i can get to them. i bought a bunch of malabrigo so i have many colors to choose from, and i downloaded many free patterns. excellent.

anyway--this is the amanda hat, which i knitted for kerstin, my friend and one of my bosses. this was my ONLY christmas knitting, and well--i gave it to her last wednesday. the good news is, she loves it! it fits her perfectly! it matches her shearling coat, which has this lovely ribbon trim in white, silver, and champagne. this hat is made from malabrigo, my current favorite hat yarn--soft and boingy and semi-solid. the color is called polar morn, and is the same color i used for my own foliage hat a while back as well as for one of the many umbrella hats i've made. love it.

note: posted on ravelry here.

ps--if you knit or crochet, and you aren't on ravelry, get on there. i mean it--there's just no reason not to!

in for it

so it turns out that we have a crazy baby. he's 8 months old now--time flies. and lately his favorite activity is what the hippie and i refer to as, "gettin' into some shit." last night while i was out knitting, the hippie was on point. he turned his back for a moment, only to turn back and find this:

it's a blurry as hell picture, but i think it gets the point across.

the kid wanted a music box that was too high to reach on the living room book shelf. so he took an emptly diaper box (one of his favorite things), pushed it over to the shelf, climbed up on it, and helped himself to the lovely little hand carved music box i have had since i was 8. naughty.

this problem solving thing he's got going on is a little scary. as is the climbing. whew.

ah, 2009...

some thoughts on the last year:

so glad that i have a happy and healthy family and a great village in which to bring up a baby. so in love with that baby and his daddy, it's not even funny. so grateful to have a job, a house i love, two kitties i love, and a neighborhood i love. i have plenty (too much!) to eat and clean water to drink. there are many people in this world i love and who love me. i feel so lucky! i feel so lucky, i almost feel guilty about how much more i have than so many people in the world. i am blessed.

this past year hasn't been all fun and games, and it's been one of the biggest adjustments of my life so far. i am sure that's not over--we are continuing to find our groove with each other as a family and to re-prioritize all our stuff. but overall, it's been a good year--a great one, even. the hardest thing has been time--i never ever feel like there's enough.

for 2009, i have more overhanging goals than resolutions.

i'd like to focus the first two months of this year on finishing up with all the loose end things hanging over my head, so that for the rest of the year, i can focus on enrichment, personal development for all of us, and play.

in january,

• i'm going to hang the aplhabet cards i got for the critter's room.
• i'm going to get all packages in need of mailing into the mail.
• i'm going to organize the crawl spaces.
• i'm going to trim the crepe myrtle tree.

in february,

• i'm going to finish all the almost-finished knitting projects (there are a few...)
• i'm going to finish my massive flower bed overhaul.
• i'm going to do my level best to get two trees planted--a redbud and a dogwood.
• i'm going to get my studio organized.

general goals for myself for 2009:

• spend more time in the studio.
• focus on debt riddance.
• walk more.
• try yoga.
• read more.
• spend more time outside.

knitting goals for 2009:

• finish kerstin's hat!!!
• make the critter a sweater.
• finish and felt 3 almost finished bags.
• pick up the baltic sea stole again.
• get started on a sweater for the hippie.
• make hats for the critter, the hippie, tristan, and amy p.
• make baby gifts for 3 babies.
• start on a blanket for my house.

note: i have all the yarn i need for all of the above projects. and more.

two possible big-ass long-term house and home things:
1) ditch all the carpet and put in bamboo flooring?
2) puppy?

and last, but definitely not least, this is a year when i want to do something to give something back to the world. i need to live greener and lessen my footprint on this earth. and i really want to do something for others this year, whether it's volunteering or knitting for charity or what--something. suggestions are welcome.

pet peeve:

i hate it when i pay for rush shipping on a thing, and they ship it rush, but take 3 days to get it out the door. hrmph.

ten random notes

1. still hate herbal tea.
2. the kid is climbing stairs.
3. cookies? they're good. really good.
4. christmas tree is up.
5. work is slow. painful--feels like i am wasting time.
6. tired. teething sucks.
7. still need to buy christmas cards.
8. determined to finish 3 nearly finished felted bags that have been ready to felt for--oh--a couple of years now.
9. sucks when the whole family gets sick at once.
10. really want to knit a hat.

and as a bonus--a cute picture of the critter:

on gardening

alice bradley is moving from the 'burbs back into brooklyn, from when she came. i am positive that she has many many reasons for doing so, but the one i can relate to the most is the mulch. when we lived downtown, our house had a yard filled with lovely blooming things that had been planted 50 years earlier and loved long enough to become well established. the grass would not grow, but there was always something lovely and interesting going on. i had ideas then of gardening--of what i would one day do, given a yard of my own. i have a yard of my own now. i hate my yard. i hate my lack of time for it and how it alwyas looks just half-assed. i have these pictures in my head of what it may one day be, but in truth, i just don't see how it's ever going to get there--at least not till the kid is about 10 and able to help trim the holly bushes that threaten to overtake the porch. someone should really do something about all the plants i have that need to go into the ground. someone should also maybe finish the Great Soil Amendment Project of 2008^* that i started last march while still pregnant and filled with illusions of grandeur. someday i will finish it. someday i will plant trees. and bulbs so i have daffodils in the spring. someday i will repot all my houseplants. someday i will mulch. meredith's coming into town this weekend. maybe i'll make her hold the baby while i work on the yard.

* the flower bed in the front of my house is full of builder's detritus and clay. i've been slowly digging this out and amending the "soil" with a mixture of peat moss, perlite, and fertilizer. it's working wonders for the weeds adjacent to the bed, and i am guessing would also be good for the plants in the bed, were there any. the hippie pokes fun at me for "planting dirt", but i maintain that this must be done before we plant anything else. last time i checked, plants and bulbs did not find tar paper and 10-penny nails nourishing. but i digress...

catching up to the present

a lot's happened in the last couple of months while i've been not blogging. time has been going by so quickly, i haven't even realized i've failed to blog it. so--let's catch up, shall we? some visual aids should help us.

labor day weekend, we went to visit my parents. kieran spent some time with some of his cousins and had his first rice cereal. he liked it. :)

we went to see the carolina rollergirls with many friends. fun, but jesus, it was HOT! the kid did pretty well with his first sporting event, in spite of the crazy loud applause.

then he got a nasty cold, but he was still happy.

luckily he was all better by the time we went to the beach, where we spent time with carrie, isaac, ella, meredith, denise, warren, and lani. i've been dreaming about putting his feet in the sand since i was pregnant, so this was particularly satisfying for me. he was very brave about the water on his feet, and he immediately put a fistful of sand in his mouth, as expected. there's a whole set of pitctures here, but here's one of my favorites, too:

there's been some knitting:

the critter started sitting, crawling, and pulling up.

fall came.

my friend tina had her baby, kyla christina. i was there with her, which is always an awesome priveledge and makes me want to become a doula. still thinking about that...

and then--suddenly it was halloween.

y'all want to tell me how the hell that all happened so fast?

and then i voted, but you guys already know about that.

whew! that only took 3 days to get posted. maybe i can get back onto the normal blogging schedule now. clearly, i should not make any promises. but man--i miss you guys!

ps--happy birthday, alyce! love and miss you like a fiend!!!
pps--good thoughts to lisa, who's having a baby as we speak!

i voted

this is the first time i have voted in my life. i have planned to vote for barak obama for president for some time, mainly because sarah palin scares the hell out of me. and i think it says something about our country that i finally registered tovote, not because i was totally gung ho for a candidate, but because i was so filled with bile and rage that i wanted to vote AGAINST someone. but i digress... anyway, i voted. and about a week ago, somewhere in all the reading, i drank the hope kool-aid. cnn just projected that obama was going to win. i have my fingers crossed that the coming change will be good. i am stunned that we have elected an african american as president of the united states in my lifetime. stunned and thrilled.

a month? really?

dang. it's been over a month since i've had the time to write anything here??? i didn't even realize it, which is pretty sad. and you know, i miss blogging--a LOT! i need to get back on it. maybe today i will try to get on here at lunch time and write the rest of the 5-month update i started--oh--at the end of september when kieran turned 5 months old. time flies, people. time flies...

cooking on the fly

having a kid makes you become first less efficient (A LOT LESS!), and then suddenly more efficient. i am finding a new groove at last. (thank you exersaucer!) i am learning to roughly plan ahead and to make stuff up on the fly. i now go to the grocery store with no real list, but instead, some vague notion that we should maybe have some food in the house and that some extra diapers wouldn't go amiss. and maybe more advil. for example, on saturday i just went to the store with this notion of coming back home with FOOD. and here is my smartest idea ever: buy a whole big family pack of boneless chicken breasts and all kinds of random vegetables. grill the whole pack of chicken. and then for days--you have dinner almost made already. i keep making random stuff with grilled chicken and veggies, and man--it's been pretty good. here are some successes:

one night i roasted a butternut squash--i chopped up half a pear (random) and put it in the cavity of the squash, rubbed the whole thing with olive oil, sprinkled a bit of cinnamon on it, and baked it for somehtng like 50 minutes at 350. when it was done, i scooped out the squashy goodness and mashed it up with a little more cinnamon, and voila. with that we had some cous cous (one of those near east boxes--i think this was the toasted pine nut variety) to which i added a handful of spinach. and by the way, i will definitely be doing THAT again. i just threw the spinach in on top of the cous cous and let it steam for a few minutes, and then stirred it in--it wilted beautifully, and man, it was good. and i think my hands on time for this whole meal was maybe 15 minutes.

chicken caesars. easy peasy. use real parmesan for this, people, and you can't go wrong.

last night i took half a box of pasta and cooked it. then i added it to a saute of mushrooms, halved grape tomatoes, and some frozen soycutash from trader joes(although you could also use pretty much any frozen vegetable or a can of something), a cup of chicken broth, some sprigs of thyme, and a few red pepper flakes. and you know, chicken. fast, low fat, and delicious.

sandwiches with sliced chicken, roasted red pepper, basil or watercress, and herbed mayo. or if you want them to look fancy, drop the mayo and serve them open faced with shaved manchego cheese and a drizzle of olive il and balsamic vinegar. yum.

burritoes!!! take some of that chicken and add some avacado, some salsa, maybe some black beans and cheese, a little cilantro if you have it. roll it up in a tortilla.

tonight we will have some sugar snap peas and something. maybe a stir-fry. i'm sure i still have some other vegetable bits and pieces hiding in that crisper drawer--half an onion, a red pepper, some mushrooms...something...

i realize there's nothing earth-shattering here, but it's made all the difference to my psyche this week. last night the hippie was reveling in the fact that we're eating at home, and that it's not all PB&J (although yum! PB&J!). it's good, finally getting back into the swing of my kitchen.

ps--speaking of PB&J, can i just tell you how good this strawberry and rhubarb jam we found is? we bought it in a general store out newr my hometown, and holy lord--YUM! just sayin'...

blogging from the iPhone: a test

sometimes it's hard for me to accept that this phone i am using has more power and memory than the computers i learned to program on. technology is just crazy, man. a friend asked me to test whether or not i could write a blog post from my iPhone. apparently yes.

fragile

it's morning, and i am sitting alone in my living room thinking about how tenuous our grasp life is. it's that same kind of panic i have written about before i guess, but today it weighs heavy. my really good friend meredith's family is experiencing a terrible tragedy, and i can't stop thinking about it. her cousin's wife collapsed last week and turns out to have an enlarged heart, which led to a cardiac arrest and countless other complications. now, they are concerned that her higher level brain functions may be permanently impaired. i would normally not presume to write about their issues, but they have a blog on which they are posting updates about her condition, so it's already out there. and really, in this case, i think the more people praying for hyatt, the better. she needs a miracle. i have never met hyatt, but she is a young mother with two daughters--her baby is about the same age as kieran, which is probably why this is hitting so close to home for me. i believe that this is something that every mother fears. in addition to your fears for your child, you fear for yourself, because--who will take care of your baby if you can't? even if you have a plan in place, money and care provided, who will be his mother? who will love him like you would love him? it's about the worst thing i can imagine right now, short of losing the baby or his father. anyway--i am a downer on this bright sunny sunday morning. i am sad. i am overcome thinking about this family and what they might lose. and i am praying as hard as i can for them.

i knitted something

it's not a big thing, but i did manage to start and finish and gift something in less than a week--this little pumpkin hat for my friend lisa who's baby is due just a few days before halloween. i feel strongly that all babies should have at least one handmade thing to surround them with love--i may even be a little superstitious about this. and well, i just don't have the time to make blankets like i used to. this little hat though--i have made it before, and i knew i could do pull it off if i tried hard. i knitted most of it in the dark while we were driving to my parents' house for a visit, and then i did the stranding at home (the night before her shower). although i had to stay up late to finish it--it was totally worth it for the smile on lisa's face when she opened it up. :)

for the record, i also managed to knit a little hat in july for our frineds clay and heather whose baby was soon to be born while we were in pennsylvania, but i don't have any photographic evidence of that one. it was a dove grey malabrigo umbrella hat--i used the leftover yarn from my foliage hat, which was still lingering around in my knitting bag.

hats are the new blanket.

critter vs. crocodile

he's chompin' it on the nose. and almost crawling--yikes!

four months

it is seriously hard for me to believe that kieran is already four months old. the last month has been dominated by change--i feel like we almost have a whole new baby every day. and lord, it's fun seeing him learn and develop and gain control of himself! he smiles all the time. he loves it when people talk to him. he laughs big deep belly laughs at his father and at me when we play with him. he's already 100% BOY. he's constantly on the move--watching things, trying to figure stuff out. he works at this most of his waking hours.

we had his 4-month doctor's appointment this past tuesday, where we got to get all the stats and brag about all his physical prowess. we answered what felt like 1000 questions, and we got a green light to start feeding him solid foods. he's doing great--doing all the things a baby his age should be doing, chubbing up properly, and generally thriving. things i mostly knew, but it's still reassuring to get the official word on it. what's not fun are the shots. they made him tired and feverish and cranky, not like our happy little man at all. and man--that's so hard to watch when there's nothing you can do for him. it makes me feel so helpless, as i know all parents do when their little ones are feeling so hot. glad it's over for a couple of months.

anyway--new this month are: deep belly laughing (he almost cackles with glee), "walking" with some help, rolling from front to back and subsequently across the room, opening his fists and exploring objects with his fingers spread wide (spirit fingers!), responding to speech with sounds of his own--he's been making sounds for a long time, but this month, they have become both responsive and more directed--i say something, he says something back, etc., tracking our food with his eyes and trying to get it with his hands--the kid is definitely ready to eat! putting his feet in his mouth, adding some consonants to those long strings of vowels.

he new dislikes: not being able to get to something he wants quickly enough, getting stuck by the arms of his playmat or the legs of the coffee table

new likes: the exersaucer!!! the crinkly wings of his bug toy (or anything else crinkly), putting anything and everything in his mouth, being picked up by his hands and feet (we only do this over the pillowtop mattress on our bed), playing with daddy is his FAVORITE right now!

visitors from out of town this month: aunt meredith, uncle jeff

right now, he's just so much fun to watch. don't get me wrong--i love playing with him, and so do the hippie and jennifer. but he's just fun to see figuring things out. often in the evening, i put him in the exersaucer, and just sit on the floor beside him while he spins the little barrel of beads, pulls on the animals attached to the exersaucer, and crinkles the wings of his bug. he looks SO serious figuring it all out, and then when he notices you looking at him, the brightest, most heart-melting smile breaks across his face. so awesome. :)

as usual, current pictures are here. the one above is a bit blurry i know, but i love the look of glee on his face. :)

roly poly

yesterday morning i laid the critter down on his play mat and went into the kitchen to make tea and grab some cereal so i could have my breakfast while he had his. i came back to find him half way across the room, tangled in the legs of the coffee table and fussing to be set free. he may not be crawling, but he's surely on the move! time to babyproof...