Monday, December 10, 2007

half way home

belly at 20 weeks

check out the belly! last friday was the 20 week mark for my pregnancy--half way home. it's still almost impossible for me to believe, even though, as you see, i have the belly to show for it. i am starting to accumulate baby stuff, which continues to freak out both the hippie and me. and yet--it's so freakin' cute, it's hard not to be a little excited about it now. it's a strange thing--i am still too nervous to be all excited. i guess everyone reacts differently. i have spent the past couple of years trying to accept NOT having any children, and here i am, about to have one. it's a tremendous mind shift. of course, i firmly believe that my baby will be the strongest and best and smartest baby ever born. of course i look forward to that smell of his little fuzzy head and to holding him asleep on my chest like a bean. but it's also so scary. i never knew what a mix of emotions i would be feeling if this ever happened to me! it's so overwhelming sometimes. the hippie is handling it all better than i am, but i think some of that is just because he's less emotional than me. it's fun, it's distracting as hell, it's nerve-wracking,a nd yes, it's exciting, too. especially now that i can feel him moving all the time. he's active, and it's not as weird as i thought it would be. in a way, it's such a comfort, him moving around. it's reassuring me that he's ok and that he's here with me. one of my best friends was telling me that it felt in some ways like a loss when her son was born, not to have him fluttering inside anymore--kind of lonely. i can totally see that. but i digress... the news of being half way is--the plague is nearly gone but for a cough i can't quite shake, and the nausea is mostly abated with a few early morning exceptions here and there. i am mostly ok, if still a bit tired. so far, so good. i have another doctor's appointment this week, in which i will certainly get to hear his heartbeat again. i look forward to that every time. :)

8 comments:

betsy said...

can we see some pictures of the nursery? it's finished, isn't it?

jackie said...

ummmm...if by finished, you mean unpainted and contains a big desk and a bunch of unorganized books, then yeah--it's ready to go!

Samantha said...

You are a brave brave woman. :-)

Anonymous said...

YES! belly pictures. i need not mention T's face:) but, yes, get use to that movement - it never stops and when it does you miss it, even years later. i write this as the little hippie bounces a ball off my living room wall, for which i give thanks, since the last 3 days he's been laying on the couch sick with strep. so, yes, the movement is a very good and comforting thing, always:) love~momxxxooo

Anonymous said...

What a great shot! :)

Can't wait to see you in person in a few weeks....

--Meredith

Betty said...

I love belly pics! I should have taken more when I was pregnant with Young Man.

KaKi said...

Hey! I met you today at GY! I was the one picking out the brown yarn with my daughter! You guys were funny! I wish I could've stayed and chatted! I have cast on for the hat. We'll see how it goes. LOVE the tummy photos! Wish that was in vogue when I was pregnant! We were still trying to hide our bellies!! :-(

Allegra said...

the belly is looking great!